Dec 7, 2020

It’s good to be home again. Well, kind of.

You know when you’ve been away from home for awhile and it seems everything needs to be done when you return? ALL the bathrooms need cleaning, the dirty laundry you brought home with you, the stack of mail to go through – and the empty fridge waiting to be stocked up. There was all of that, and grief sprinkled over all of it.

I scheduled a free coaching session with a potential new coach over 2 months ago, and the appointment happened to be the day after I got home. I had meant to cancel it, but in all that was going on in the weeks after my Mom passed away, I kept forgetting. Like, literally forgot. I couldn’t remember the coaches’ name, her company name. Email searches didn’t bring it up. Nothing. So on the day we buried our Mom, I got a reminder email that my appointment was the next day.

Let me explain here why I was looking for a coach; Because coaching is LIFE.CHANGING. That’s why. Even coaches need coaches, because we are also human and have human brains. So at any given time, I am working with a coach.

So, I decided to show up for the appointment that didn’t seem appropriately timed, but actually, was perfectly timed.

At one point during the session I told her that my Mom had recently passed, that I just got home, that there was SO much to do and I just wasn’t sure where to begin. Or if I even wanted to do any of it.

She replied with this question, “What ONE rock do you need to move today?”

I replied, “One? What about the other 14 rocks that need to be moved?” I also asked her “Why rocks?” in the analogy. No reason other than it’s just a good visual.

She explained that if I look at all 14 rocks at once and expect myself to move them all, I most likely won’t get very far. Or I will be a very miserable person in the process. “When was the last time you got all 14 things done?”, she asked.

I had to admit she got me on that one.

She continued to show me that if I just begin by focusing on the next important thing that needs to be done, rather than on the entire household of things to be done, I will actually get more done and won’t be consumed by overwhelm.  The next important thing = The one rock.

This wasn’t an entirely new concept to me. But it was extremely helpful to look at it in a way that my very foggy brain could understand.

So, that has been my focus the remainder of the week. One day it was to finish Thank You cards for those who sent flowers or food after Mom passed away. Another day it was to get out all the Christmas decorations. Another day to plan the menu for the week and get to the grocery store.

I just focused on the next important thing, the One rock, and got it done. Friday was a rough day. I just couldn’t get through the the sludge I was feeling. So I went and slept for an hour, talked to my sister on the phone, and then got up and focused again on the next important thing.

I’m reminding myself to go at a pace I can keep up with. Actually, even at a slower-than-usual pace, I am accomplishing much more than my One rock, and it puts my brain at ease knowing that the next important thing is en route to being finished.

Then I decide on the next important thing, and the next.

My bathrooms are still a mess. Maybe I’ll delegate those to my teenagers.

Much love,

P.S. The One Rock and The Next Important Thing are examples of the great tools used in Life Coaching. Such tools reduce stress and help you look at things from a different angle. That new angle uncovers what’s preventing you from moving forward. If you are feeling stuck, I’d love to talk with you on a FREE Discovery Call. Schedule here  Stress-Less with Meredith G Coaching!